New Start

It really doesn't seem like we've been gone for almost a month, but it does seem like I haven't touched my instrument in a month.  I'll see how that turns out.  

I generally search for symbols in my life, trying to mesh everything around me with what I'm feeling at that moment.  Naturally, the beginning of a new year, semester, and president have become a symbol of my own life.  I know that if I could cut my life into periods, I would have one giant 19 1/2 year one and one that seemed to have started this weekend.  While my life isn't completely veering in another direction, it is getting there in a way that I never saw coming, and I couldn't be happier about it.  Within the past couple of months I can honestly say that I have had the happiest moments of my life.  I can finally be comfortable with what I do for a living, who I choose to live it with, how I'm going to achieve my life goals, and what I have to do to make sure I get there.

I'm setting the bar high for myself this semester.  I have my sights on a 4.0 and I won't be content lowering it to fulfill my present wants to be lazy or not do my best.  I pay too much money to go here, so I shouldn't be wasting the opportunity to perform with quality and turn in quality work.  Do I honestly think I'm going to get a 4.0?  No.  But if I only think of setting the bar for 3.7-3.8, I won't even get close.  I need to strive to be as close to perfect as possible.  My cumulative average right now is about a 3.0.  Not even close to an accurate representation of my work ethic or my drive to do well.  Freshman year was garbage.  I couldn't wait for that year to be over, wanting to go home almost every weekend, and certainly not wanting practice or do my work.  Sadly, I can't redo it or start over even though I wish I could for every reason I can think of.  The most I can do now is strive to be perfect.  I think the highest average I can graduate with is a 3.6 now, but I don't know the exact method of calculating it.  I'm not even happy about that.  I suppose the goal would be to show significant improvement throughout my last 5 semesters.  Hopefully I can find a way to do it.  I feel good about it now.  I have the motivation to do it now.