Black Friday

The day began at 5am instead of 3am---thank god. Me, my brother, and my mom were in Walmart by 6:20am and it was quite packed. We heard over the loud speaker: "Will the lady who witnessed the altercation in the cleaning isle please report to the customer service desk!" as soon as we walked in. I guess there was an ambulance outside at one point too, all before we even got there. There sure is nothing like the Christmas spirit!
After this we went to JC Penny's to buy me a suit. They had only 2 jackets to pick from and they both sucked, so we decided to go to the mall to find one. I was told, by my dad, that I was under a strict budget of $80. In fact, I wasn't to spend anything close the $80. Yeah....that wasn't going to get me anywhere. So we found a suit that came out to just over $100, and that was cheap because it was marked down from $200. I can't for my dad to ask me how much it cost me, honestly. He has no idea what things like this cost, and no idea of how important it is for me to actually have a suit. He maybe uses his once a year, if that. I'm glad my mom understands, she finally convinced my dad to pay for my books until I can comfortably pay for them myself, not wipe out my checking account (which they did this year).

Before I digress: I'm really freaking poor. I have no money on my person. Luckily my mom can cover for my lack of a job. My point is that I can't afford everything we decide to go and do, and the last thing I want to do is not go and do these things. So as of now, I will not except any money from you guys. I simply cannot afford to pay you guys back. I still owe my dad money for my car insurance and whatever else he decides I owe him. Therefore, whenever I can actually have money, I need to give it all away again. Then I'm back to having no money, and to many things to pay for. Yesterday I got $50 bucks from my aunt and uncle in a very very late birthday card. I'm now left with $30 after gas and my Secret Santa gift. I want to make this stretch as much as possible, so guys, please bare with me, at least until I find a job. I'm not marching Statesmen this summer for this specific reason--I can't afford anything.

Now I digress:
I bought my Secret Santa gift. Whoever it is should like it. Thank my aunt and uncle.
Then I went home and drank eggnog. The end.

Thanksgivings Day Revolution

Andy is lending me Kurt Vonnegut's "A Man Without a Country," and I love it. It isn't making me think in new directions, but it perfectly highlights everything I think about anyway. It allows me to think critically and be analytical

However, just sitting and the dinner table today, with tons of thoughts running through my head, I realized: Wow, I'm a pretty negative person, and I have so much to be thankful for. You guys are the best friends I've ever had. I just think back to a year ago, and I really had no close friends at school. The "friends" I did have effing ditched me around October, leaving me with NOBODY to hang out with. Although I didn't want to, I latched on to Lauren. It's not like Lauren was an absolute bitch and I hated being around her. We mutaully agreed to go and find friends on our own, so this seemed to be a huge renig on my part. But, lo and behold, our friend groups crossed and we all know the rest. I was thankful for Lauren, today. And everybody else : )

Anyway, the point of what I'm saying is that I need to think more positively. I can't fix everything or be an advocate for everything. Of course i dont encourage anyone to sit around and let injusitices take care of themselves--I just wish people could stop thinking critically of everything because in the end, you may perhaps make things seem worse in your head. I have never been so happy in my life. Why should I dwell on everything thats going to suck in the future? The direction of my life is right on course to where I want it to be, thanks to my best friends. I can't wait to see everybody.

My House

Let's just talk about how absolutely freezing it is in my house. The only thing we have heating the entire place is a coal stove in my living room. The pipe "must" be kept at 100 degrees, so the air coming out of it is making the house average at around 64 degrees--too cold for the time of year when you want to be cozy and warm. Then upstairs is even colder. My room has to be in the 50's! I can't wait to get into my warm bed at school, honestly.

I have a blog now?

So, I'm feeling the pressure to start yet another useless internet endeavor. This will be among the 5 websites I visit in this order: Facebook, Email, Blog, Failblog, YouTube. I'll never get work done.

I'm starting this blog at such a strange time. I should discuss so much, but I just won't. I don't think I believe in writing all my woes and feelings into a public place. But, I will say some things.

I like where I am in life. I've made my best friends within a few short months, but it seems like it has been so much longer. I'll close with one of my favorite quotes:


"Kite-flying is a double-edged experience, at once liberating and a reminder of your earthbound nature. The kite is a part of you and yet not a part of you, it is like having your soul on a long string tugging at you, attached to your body and yet with a life of its own. The temptation, of course, is to let go."-James Robertson, "The Testament of Gideon Mack"